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We are impelled to think about, and seek out, this other person so intensely that it disrupts our ability to concentrate on anything else. Obsession is a motivational drive gone haywire. What is actually happening when we become obsessed with someone else to that extent, and what causes it?

This wholesale shift in psychology demands some explanation. Limerence is an altered mental state in which a romantic obsession becomes the central, inescapable, focus of life and causes a profound change in emotional stability. When this kind infatuation moves beyond a simple crush and becomes an all-encompassing obsession, it feels like addiction to another person, or “ limerence“. Rather than being trapped by personal fears, we instead become entranced by another person. Sometimes we can become fixated on a fear, or a memory, or a vice, which captures our attention so completely that our thoughts become a prison.